Saturday, 28 June 2008

Wedding season

We've got a couple of weddings to go to this summer, as we have had every year for I suppose the last ten. Every year I think we might be getting to the end of the "phase", and every year I'm proved wrong!

Leaving aside how tricky it is to guarantee my husband will get the day off for the event itself, it's an expensive business, going to weddings. You've got to pay to get there (and that's become silly money now, with the price of fuel), pay to stay somewhere nearby, for at least one night, or, if it's close, fork out for a taxi or train. You might also feel you have to go on the hen/stag night, which nowadays is often a weekend or even a week somewhere pricey. You also often end up getting a new outfit (not necessarily, I grant you, but traditional all the same). And then, of course, there's the present.

I know, of course, from my own experience, how expensive weddings can be. It seems that the wedding industry in this country is just getting ridiculous. Official stats put the average cost of a wedding at £30,000. Incredible. Clearly, then, giving the bride and groom a small token of your appreciation for the invite is all well and good. Wedding lists are now the norm, and in fact, we had one. It was great. After years of living with studenty plates and cutlery we were finally able to get some nice things for our home, and people were happy to buy us things that we really wanted.

My rant here though is caused by the contents of a friend's wedding list for this summer. It really made ours look cheap! On it are things like an £100 double duvet cover, and an £80 set of bathroom scales. Each wine glass (just normal glass, mind you, not crystal) is something like £15. I needed a glass of wine after I'd looked at it, let me tell you!

Is it just me, or is there something just ugly about that sort of list? We assumed the average spend would be about £50, and listed accordingly, but their list makes you feel as if only an £100 duvet cover will do. Essentially, it made me uncomfortable. I appreciate it's difficult for couples who've lived together for years, as they have a lot of the basics already, but...

But... surely it's the fact that your friends and family are coming all that way to see you marry each other that counts, not the souvenirs at the end of the day? Surely it's the emotion of the day, not the remuneration, that should matter? Or am I just an insensitive, miserly, inverted snob? Answers on a postcard, please..


  1. I dont know how the money translates to the US dollar but it seems a bit pretentious to have only expensive stuff on a registry - it seems "etiquette" would say to put all priced items on it - so buy one glass and dont worry about it!! Also, I hope most couples understand that the traveling TO the wedding is a gift in itself - and they'd better mention that in the thank you card - although these days I seem to be lucky to get a thank you card in the first place!!

    but seriously, I am totally with you about the worrying if the pilot husband will get the time off in the first place;)

  2. you are working hard for it.....just go ahead..

  3. I agree, I went to a wedding like that a few years ago... There's no need for it at all! I would feel embarrassed to put a list like that out to my friends and loved ones-it's so arrogant to assume that everyone will be able to keep up with it, and it puts your own guests in an uncomfortable or embarrassing situation!

    As an aside, that RC Helicopter pilot keeps adding random comments on my blog too (I tried to email him, but he posted a fake email address-it's clearly spam... He is hoping that he will get high volumes of traffic from people in the aviation industry. I am going to delete the comments that have no relevance as I want no part of it!)




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