A Christmas in the Middle East

We're currently in the UK on another madcap dash around the country visiting family, before returning to the Gulf a few days before Christmas. It's a beautiful morning here, just above freezing with the sun out and low in the sky, one of my favourite kinds of day. I'm glad we managed to find time do this, as there's nothing quite like sharing this time of year with those you love - particularly given the terrible time my husband and his father have been through in the last four months. I feel like it's a perfect compromise, as my husband didn't manage to get Christmas off this year. To be honest, I've always preferred the run-up to Christmas more than the actual day itself anyhow. This way we get to have fun with our families, see a bit of the UK, stock up on some Christmas essentials we can't buy at home, and generally indulge all our British foibles for a little while. After all, this will be our last visit here until the baby is born, as long-haul flying will soon become too dangerous and uncomfortable for me to make it worthwhile.

What has really surprised me recently is how nice preparing for a Christmas in the Gulf has actually been. Obviously we live in a Muslim country, but I have been pleasantly surprised to see Christmas decorations (including nativity scenes!) widely available in the shops, and Christmas decorations up in the shopping centres and restaurants. We had a wonderful luxurious meal at a 5* hotel the other day for my husband's birthday, and there was an absolutely enormous tree there - it must have been more than 12 feet tall! (Oh, and a human sized gingerbread house.. they don't do things by halves in the Gulf states!)

I've also enjoyed gathering the ingredients for our traditional British Christmas cake (lots of dried fruit, brandy, marzipan and icing) and putting up our tree, which is the hugest we have ever had, even in the UK! And I also *think* I have our Christmas meal sorted, having even found a Turkey imported from the USA!

All in all, somehow it feels fine that we'll be spending the Christmas week so far from "home". As you know, we'll hopefully be spending Christmas Eve in the USA together, and part of Christmas Day on a plane (in Business Class, thank God...!) So this year isn't traditional for us in any sense, and I'm really getting to like that. This year has made me take myself out of my comfort zone, and I've been amazed by how much I've enjoyed the results, despite the obvious challenges involved. Sometimes you can really surprise yourself.

And despite getting used to a cold, frosty (and let's face it, often wet and dreary!) UK Christmas, I'm quite looking forward to a warm and sunny Christmas for a change. It's all rather more authentic, anyhow. This is where Christmas began, after all...

A move towards the East

It's exactly a year since my husband got the job offer he'd been waiting for, and we knew we'd be moving out to the Gulf. A great deal has changed in that year...

For a start, I've noticed a real shift in attitudes towards the Middle Eastern airlines amongst the flying community. When we first announced we were moving out here, a lot of our pilot friends felt slightly sorry for us, having to move our lives halfway across the world. There was definitely a feeling that being in a Muslim country would be a tremendous trial for us, too (I've lost count of the number of times I've been asked if I can drive, work or drink alcohol here, etc, etc). Of course, we were forced into a corner to come here by the collapse of my husband's old airline, so we felt sorry for ourselves, too.

Now, though, things seem to be changing. We've been contacted by a great number of British pilots asking about the recruitment process here, driven of course by the dire state of the industry in Europe at the moment. Many UK airlines are offering career breaks to pilots who take a job elsewhere, which is a very attractive offer that many of them are choosing to take up. And on closer inspection, living out here isn't as bad as many fear. One pilot recently asked us if we would choose to do this again if we were actually given the choice. So I thought about my answer...

Well, for a start, my husband is flying for an airline with very, very deep pockets. Just knowing it's not going to go bust any second is quite wonderful. My husband is flying an aircraft he has always wanted to, and didn't expect to be able to do at this relatively early stage of his career. Financially we are doing pretty well, despite the fact I'm only working very part-time. This is of course helped by the complete absence of tax here (yes, there really is NO tax!). We have comprehensive international health cover, and the hospitals out here are extremely good, which is a relief, as I'm planning on giving birth in one! And of course our accommodation is provided, we can rent our house out at home, we get great staff travel across the industry, we get a transport and communications allowance, will get school fees paid... etc, etc. Suffice to say we're better off here than we were at home.

Then, of course, there's the biggie; we really don't believe I'd be pregnant if we were still living in the UK and I was still working full time in my stressful job. For us, that's the deal breaker.

So, despite the negatives of living here - being far from friends and family, the difficulties of living in a different culture - we are actually very happy, as are almost all of the expat pilots and their families who have moved out here in the last year, too. We all agree that basically, life out here is what you make it. If you want to be miserable, it's perfectly easy to do that (just stay in and refuse to meet people, don't personalise your house, spend all your time staring at the TV, etc). But if you get out there and do things, meet people, and make the most of things, it's a pretty great place to live.

My husband and I were walking along the seafront the other day in the lovely warm (but not hot) evening breeze, reflecting on how life has changed for us over the past year. We both agree that this period of our lives is going to be one we will look back on extremely fondly.

There've certainly been lots of downs along with the ups, but on balance - would I do this again, given the choice? Yes, absolutely. Although of course I'd like to do the move knowing what I know now, not arriving clueless as we actually did... Wouldn't it be great if we could always do that?

Oh, for time travel...

Four months

I'm officially over four months pregnant now, and I never fail to be amazed daily by what a huge blessing it is. We had another scan yesterday and were absolutely spellbound by the wriggling, healthy baby we saw on the scan! In fact the baby was moving so much the doctor couldn't get a clear image of it, so we're left with lots of vague pictures of shapes that may be a head/stomach/leg. Well, no matter, it's still there and it's healthy!

The only fly in the ointment was that I got told off by my doctor for managing to put on 3 kilos in the last 5 weeks (apparently 1.5 is ideal). Clearly all those fry-ups in Scotland were not the best thing! Whoops...

As is usual for me, I'm starting to get over excited about Christmas already. We're hopefully heading back to the UK for a week beforehand, which will be lovely. Christmas somehow wouldn't feel quite right without the requisite cold, miserable UK weather! Then we're back here just before the big day, and unfortunately my husband's been given a trip to the USA on the 23rd of December, flying back on Christmas day! A long way short of ideal.

We felt a bit down about it yesterday, but checked the loads out this morning and it looks like I have a more than fighting chance of getting on the flights. So, Christmas day in Business Class it is for me! This obviously isn't brilliant, but it does mean we get to spend Christmas Eve in the US together, and will both be home on Christmas day in time for an opening of presents and festive meal in the evening. Then we'll do our traditional Christmas lunch on Boxing Day!

If this had happened last year I think I'd have been devastated about it (given how much of a kid I am about Christmas) but to be honest, having seen our wonderful baby on the scan yesterday and realising that we really COULD be cradling a healthy child in our arms next May, nothing could dampen my spirits. Not even a rubbish Christmas roster!

"Us" time

We've just come back from a long trip to the UK, which included a very needed holiday for just the two of us. We realised recently that we haven't been on a "just the two of us" break since September last year, and since we'll be three next year, it seemed like we should make it a priority!

We started our break with a couple of weeks seeing family, which was vital. My husband and his father are still reeling from the death of my mother-in-law, so it was important for them to spend some time together. Sometimes I have no idea what to say to either of them, but I'm trying to help just by doing practical things, and just being there. Seeing them in so much pain is terrible.

It was during our time staying with his Dad that my husband said he planned to spring a surprise trip on me. I was very excited about this (as even our honeymoon was planned by us both!) and I expected it to be a couple of nights in London before our flight home. I was entirely wrong. It turned out to be what my husband entitled "The great pre-bump UK tour", and it was fabulous. We put in some serious miles on the hire car, and drove via my parents' lovely country home to the Lake District, then up to the Scottish Highlands and then on to Edinburgh. Believe it or not, I've never been to Scotland before (despite having travelled across the world many times!) so this was a great opportunity, and the sort of trip it would be very tricky to do with a baby in tow.

We had a wonderful, relaxed time taking in the fantastic scenery and immense breakfasts (whoops). The picture above was taken during our drive through the Lakes - amazing to actually be at the end of a rainbow! (Sadly we didn't find a pot of gold).

Pregnancy wise, things are going well, we hope. We had the 12 week scan before we headed back to the UK, and everything looked ok so far. I'm now 15 weeks and I'm really starting to show. Several people we don't know, like people working in shops, have noticed, and that makes it all seem wonderfully real! There's really no hiding it now, even if I wanted to. I've invested in some maternity clothes, taking advantage of the fact that the UK shops were selling off their summer stock when I was home - hooray! Definitely a benefit of living in a country where the sun shines every day!

Symptoms wise, I have an itchy tummy (which I assume is the skin stretching?), heartburn, occasional muscle pain around my stomach (which I think is round ligament pain), a dodgy back, and I still need to pee ALL the time! Brilliant.

My husband is being fantastic about the pregnancy, more than I could ever have hoped. He's read all the books (and seems to know more facts than me!) and is incredibly supportive, which is so vital when you live so far away from home and you're feeling hormonally emotional.

Of course, I'm already worried that my husband will just have taken off for a long-haul trip to the US just as I go into labour... I'm thinking of asking a friend to be a stand-by birthing assistant. Does anyone who's been there have any advice?